Fourth of July Shirt Championship
Official Rules & Regulatory Compliance Portal — Est. 2015
Portal Version 4.2.1 | Last Updated: See Addendum 7-C | Document ID: OSS-2026-RUL-14B
To access the Official Contest Rules, click the button below.
Please read all rules in their entirety before participating. The complete and binding rules are contained within the website.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ) — General Contest Information
Q: Where can I find the official rules?
A: The official rules are available on this page. Please refer to the Official Rulebook PDF (available via the download button below) if you are unable to locate the rules contained within.
Q: Who judges the contest?
A: Judging criteria and judge selection are handled by the Office of Shirt Supremacy. Decisions are final. See also: Standing Order 7 (classified).
Q: Can I submit a waiver?
A: Waiver requests are subject to strict deadlines. Please consult Section §5 of Administrative Supplement 14-B for waiver eligibility and submission procedures.
Contest History, Archives & Prior Championship Records (2015–2025)
Historical records are maintained under Standing Order 7 and are not available for public review at this time. Requests for archival access may be submitted via the waiver portal. Processing time is 6–8 business years.
Champion identities are withheld to protect the dignity of runners-up.
Administrative Supplement 14-B: Operational Parameters & Non-Critical Compliance Documentation (Revised June 2026)
The following operational parameters have been ratified by the Office of Shirt Supremacy and are binding upon all registered contest participants. These parameters supersede any and all prior verbal agreements, handshake deals, vibes-based understandings, or previous versions of Administrative Supplement 14-B (including 14-A, 14, and the informal "14-ish" document circulated in 2019). Participants are presumed to have read these rules in full. Ignorance of a rule is not a valid defense. Claiming you didn't see this section is not a valid defense. Claiming the text was too small is not a valid defense.
§1. Arrival Window — Attendance Parameters. All contest participants must be present no earlier than 1700L (local time). All contest participants must be present no later than 1704L (local time). The authorized arrival window is therefore four (4) minutes in duration. Arrivals prior to 1700L constitute an anticipatory violation. Arrivals after 1704L constitute a tardiness violation. Both violations result in immediate disqualification. There are no exceptions. There is no grace period. The four-minute window is not a suggestion.
§2. Beard Bows — Absolute Prohibition. Absolutely NO BEARD BOWS. The prohibition on beard bows is total, unconditional, and without exception or waiver. A "beard bow" is defined as any bow, ribbon, tie, clip, ornament, or decorative fastener affixed to facial hair of any length, texture, or patriotic intent. The prohibition applies regardless of bow size, bow color, bow material, or the sincerity with which the beard bow was intended to display patriotism. Do not ask about beard bow waivers. There are no beard bow waivers. See §2 (this section) for the beard bow waiver policy.
§3. Attire Color Compliance. All patriotic displays must contain RED, WHITE, and BLUE attire. All three (3) colors are required. A display containing only two (2) colors is non-compliant. A display containing only one (1) color is embarrassing. A display containing zero (0) colors suggests the participant is not wearing a shirt, which is a separate and additionally disqualifying condition. Color proximity to red, white, or blue (e.g., "mauve," "eggshell," "navy-adjacent") does not satisfy the attire requirement. The contest judge's determination of color validity is final and may not be appealed.
§4. Wagering. No wagering.
§5. Waiver Requests — Submission Deadline. All waiver requests were due no later than (NLT) 1945 hours GMT on 11 June 2026. That deadline has passed. The waiver submission portal remains technically accessible below for historical and archival purposes only. Submissions received after the deadline will not be reviewed, considered, acknowledged, or read. The Office of Shirt Supremacy wishes you the best in your unwaivered participation. Submit Waiver Request →
Technical Appendix D: Portal Accessibility Statement & Browser Compatibility Notice
This portal is optimized for viewing on all devices. If you are experiencing difficulty reading any portion of this page, please try adjusting your browser zoom settings. The Office of Shirt Supremacy is not responsible for inadequate eyesight, insufficient screen brightness, or a fundamental unwillingness to read the rules.
Official Rules of Shirt Supremacy
The following represents the summary overview of contest rules for convenient reference. For the complete, binding, and official rules, please download the Official Rulebook PDF below.
Rule 1: Wear a shirt.
Rule 2: Be patriotic.
Rule 3: Have fun.
Final judgment is absolute, non-negotiable, and delivered in the spirit of liberty. Complaints will be ignored in the name of democracy.
* This summary is provided for convenience only and does not constitute the official rules. The complete official rules are contained within the website, accessible above. By reading this summary you acknowledge that you have read, or had ample opportunity to read, the complete official rules.
Download Official Rulebook PDFHall of Champions
Records updated annually by the Office of Shirt Supremacy. Historical records maintained under Standing Order 7.
Champion data is classified. Inquiries may be submitted via the waiver portal. See §5 for waiver portal status.
